Sunday, April 6, 2014

Hey there, Stranger: A letter to a lost best friend.




Hey there, Stranger,

It's been a while since we last talked. I am sure you know by now that the decision of turning into strangers was yours and not mine. I have no idea how you are doing but somewhere in the corner of my heart I know you are doing well. I think its weird that we, who were once so inseparable, have cut off all our ties and contacts in such a beautiful way that even if we want, we cannot find our way back to each other. Life is weird and we humans, twisted.

At times I wonder what went wrong? What happened to all our promises and years of friendship? We were too young to make promises you'd say?It makes me sad to think that what meant so much to me, at the end of the day was just another chapter in the book of your life. But I sincerely want to thank you for being there for me and then cutting off all ties. I sometimes find myself stuck in those memories, I find myself wondering how wonderful it would have been if we had stayed in touch. If we could just call up each other once in a while? Or well, calling has become archaic, but texting? We could definitely drop in a word or two or call each other on our birthday's or New Year? We have been through so much and you were such an integral part of my life that it tears me apart everytime I think,'how difficult it would have been to just ask if the other was doing fine?' The decision of staying in touch or not was always yours. Turns out you made the easier choice.

There is so much to say but every time I begin to write something, I end up fighting those memories. So I have decided, this is it. I am writing this letter aware of the fact that you will never read it but I just want to say, I really loved you with all I had. But I guess sometimes that is just not enough. I have tried and tried for years to get over my feelings for you, despite of knowing that you didn't take a days time to get over yours. And maybe that is what hurts me a little more. How you could make my feelings seem so insignificant in front of your pragmatism?

But I am beginning to get over the past and now I know I have come so far that I won't ever return, I know that if you call me years later, asking for a chance to talk, I will. I will happily meet you over a coffee, share a word or two and laugh about how great my life has been. However, I will never be able to tell you that no matter where I went, I carried a huge hole in my heart that screeched, unable to find you. I will never be able to tell you that this heartache was like a broken bone and even though it healed with time, every time I tried to move, it hurt.

People ask me to forget you but it is not possible to forget you, I won't. Because forgetting you would mean forgetting myself. And I don't want that to happen. What I am today is such a big chunk of what you made out of me. So I sit here and wish. I wish that where ever you are, who ever you are with, you are happy. I wish you a great future and a great life. And even though we are nothing but strangers, I wish for you nothing
short of happiness.

Never to be yours again,
Your once best friend.

8 comments:

  1. It's sad when such things happen ... the friend with whom you shared everything about your life turns into a stranger, and then a dark deep loneliness blinds your thoughts .... a hollow that gets created with the loss ... but having said that, with time we learn to accept things, and though the memories remain, the wound certainly gets healed...

    Loved the beautiful narration Ayushee ... very well written :-)

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  2. its really really well written and well expressed...touched me..!!

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  3. It is super touchy dear! What were you doing when you wrote this piece?

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  4. I'm more than glad your past has left behind.. And I have to thank your 'Best Friend' for that :)
    Well written.. Finally saw one of your blog post and commented ;P

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